ok, so this is about james’s friend james and his friend. if you’re still with me you’re going to love this…

so two of his friends were doing mushrooms at a park somewhere. where, who cares, but they were doing it. only james 2 got bored so he went home and sobered up, leaving his friend in the park, tripping. lovely. after a while, when he was sober, he decided to pay his friend a visit to make sure he was okay. so at his friends house, his friend was still very much under the effects. he was wielding a knife and screaming “i’ve locked a goblin in the wardrobe! i’ve caught a goblin! i’m gonna kill it! i’m gonna kill it!”. james tried to calm his friend down, and looked in the wardrobe. there, in the wardrobe, was a small child with (apparent) downs syndrome. panicking, they decided to take it back to the park where his friend had apparently kidnapped it and locked it in the wardrobe.

if you’ve ever needed a reason not to do drugs, i think this qualifies as a good one.

wow, interesting day (and an interesting title, i’m in an odd mood).

i am still ill and there seems to be no signs of improvement, though my headaches have stopped. which is good.

yesterday was rather interesting. after i got back, we went out and basically acted like immature idiots. running around, knocking on peoples doors then driving off. fact is, i was with a group of 20 year olds. “mature” adults running around. excellent.

got home, phoned hen for like 10 minutes (she was worn out after her first day as a vet bless her) then fell asleep. had the strangest dream AGAIN. you know, i think there’s a connection with being ill and strange dreams. i will look into that. but this one was about a gang of asylum seekers going into peoples houses and stealing illegal immigrants and selling them. when i tried to stop them they were like invincible, no matter how many times i knocked them out cold. their license plate was “SUM M0NER” which was strange since all license plates in England have maximum of 7 figures. hmm.

for lunch i had a fudge doughnut and a bottle of pepsi. i’m so hungry.

so i’m still ill, and since i’ve been ill i’ve been having really strange dreams. one dream i met my girlfriends parents and we had a lol then suddenly we were all naked or something, and then a fire happened and i woke up about then. this dream, however, was a lot more interesting and scary.

so i was at home waiting for someone. i was stood by my window just waiting for someone to come. a car to pull up. i waited and waited, and eventually someone came. it was a car full of my old friends. anyway, we drove all day and eventually made it to some weird hall place, and there, of all people, were DRAGONFORCE. yes, i dreamt i went to a dragonforce concert. how scary is that? there they were, all of them. i even met them apparently, with one of them with an awful giant mouth, and the guitarist and such. anyways, we were waiting for them to play, but i went into some sideroom and there was paris hilton, so i eventually ended up having sex with paris hilton somehow. about this time i woke up in a cold sweat. that was an awful dream.

helen FINALLY got round to uploading SOME of the pictures from saturday, so i might steal a few and put them up. there are some hilarious ones.

in other news, putting the camel spider in your blog gets you views. really, i’ve had over 70 views from people searching camel spider or camel spiders. and the picture i put of the japanese crab spider has over 20 views already! not bad for a days work in my opinion.

i miss hen so much. need to see her soon!

so not alot has happened recently, but i am single! any offers? ;D

ball is dead! world cup ‘66 man of the match died yesterday :(

lately i’ve been reading up on spiders (despite being a severe arachnophobiac) and came across the camel spider. it’s VICIOUS, it eats lizards for christ sake. there’s also the japanese spider crab, which is actually beautiful. i mean, look at it.

it’s a delicacy in japan apparently.

two girls killed a girl “because they felt like it”. utter twats.

so car theft has reduced alot, but PEOPLE ARE PAYING MORE CAR INSURANCE.

that is actually ridiculous.

he’s that guy who’s judging GREASE IS THE WORD/stupid pointless music competition #4834. not only does he look like a fucking alien, he’s just a horrible horrible… well, i just hate him.

that advert he does, the one advertising “THIS IS DAVID GEST”, is the most annoying thing i’ve seen in a long long time.

might as well get it all out…

why is it that emmerdale have such AWFUL actors? i mean, i can forgive hollyoaks since they were hired on looks (even though the accents are annoying), but emmerdale is shit. it’s boring (come on, it’s in FARMLAND for christ sake). i mean, don’t get me wrong, i hate soaps as much as the next bloke, but emmerdale is right there at the bottom of the pile. why do i watch it? well it’s on when i’m on the pc. background noise, sometimes i pick up on it. something like that.

gah, i hate tv. that public information film was made about shows just like it.

click this link for goodies

this is my video in multimedia project work. a short public information film mocking boring tv. it’s badly done for a reason, and that’s to imitate the 1950’s black and white ones. only we didn’t have time to make it look like that. it’s not as good as it could be, but have a look anyway eh?