Poststhis blog is now “celebrity masterchef: how three ex-celebrities learnt how to cook chips from a box” and utilities that can cause infertility; stay away from that tap you devil child!
i am in a semi colon mood.
so i haven’t been blogging much recently, not that many care but the reason is because i’ve been having lots of FAMILY TIME. spending lots of time with the family. not my mother, god. i can’t stand her. my aunties and stuff. it was fun, involved quite a bit of drinking, too much eating, and fun. i feel so very fat it’s unbelievable. i’m going to weigh myself tonight, and i expect i weigh at least 10 stone now. before i was at a nice 9 stone. bastard cream cakes. if it’s bad i’m going to strive to lose weight, any idea how?
yesterday night i got quite drunk. it was grandad’s birthday (71) and we were drinking lots of moscow mules (part vodka, part some weird other strong alcohol, part ginger ale) and beer throughout the night, and eating party food.
right now i’m sat here feeling quite ill and i haven’t got much to say. oh, henrietta started a blog, it’s in my blogroll somewhere, can’t be bothered directly linking.
how about that global warming eh? feels like it, it’s been so hot. there’s also been reports of the “fake widow” spider in britain, and reports of bites and stuff. since i am petrified of them, this is not good news. i’m just praying that the camel spider doesn’t migrate over here. i would probably move out of the country if that was ever to happen. the camel spider is currently on my top list of things i want to die. check this out.
this gives me nightmares. jesus christ. on the topic of spiders, check these out. they’re horrifying.
the cobalt blue spider. if all spiders were like this, then we could see them easier. then we could KILL THEM.
the goliath bird eater. scary as fuck.
huntsman spider, or clock spider. incredibly horrid legs. so with all these spiders, here’s the one i’m the most afraid of.
that’s right, the common house spider. fucking hell.
p.s. you can find some of my drawings here although i don’t think there’ll be any camel spiders.
Mike
Comment on June 4, 2007 @ 5:32 pm
holy shit blue spider = awesome
iamafatcat
Comment on June 4, 2007 @ 5:48 pm
“the camel spider is currently on my top list of things i want to die.”
and im guessing im next :(
nice but terrifying blog
i love you x
leindiemeister
Comment on June 5, 2007 @ 12:36 am
i have an aversion to spiders, too. my first grade teacher had a pet tarantula. freaked me out SOOO much.
Singing Librarian
Comment on June 5, 2007 @ 3:10 pm
I actually quite like the blue one, mainly because, as you say, you could easily see it coming in most terrains (though it would blend quite nicely with my office chair) and could avoid/capture/squish it with little difficulty.
I wish I knew how to lose weight. When I was at university, I ended up at 9 and a half stone, which was dangerously low for my height, but I’m now edging closer and close to 12 stone, which is just too much. More will power would be the key. No alcohol. No chocolate. No cheese. How dull.
Felicia
Comment on June 5, 2007 @ 3:44 pm
Fuck, that was scary!
Mina
Comment on July 5, 2007 @ 9:27 am
I have these things as PETS and Im a girl. Jesus! WUSS.
Jess
Comment on September 17, 2007 @ 1:04 pm
One time, a huntsman spider (very common in Sydney) craweled into my bedroom when I was away for a few days, and laid hundreds of eggs. Outdoors, normally, most of the eggs would blow away and they would spread out and hatch in different places, but seeing as there was no wind in my house, they all hatched, and when I came home, they were all running around on my ceiling, on my bed,and hanging down on their little threads!
So my family and I sucked them up with a vaccume cleaner and I slept somewhere else for a week. We couldn’t find the mother anywhere, so we assumed she had scurried off. How wrong I was…
A couple of night after I started sleeping in my room again, I was lying in bed for hours, awake with a feeling that something was wrong. So at about 2am, I turned on the light, and then I saw the mother crawl out from under my covers and it was HUUUUGE!!! The biggest one I’ve ever seen by far.
So my dad caught it and set it outside, but you should have seen the way it ran when he tried to catch it. It’s always the scariest when they run.
adam
Comment on September 17, 2007 @ 1:16 pm
oh my god that is the most terrifying story i’ve ever heard.
i’m going to have nightmares tonight.
bill
Comment on January 16, 2009 @ 6:34 pm
Here’s your camel spider…
http://entmuseum.ucr.edu/insect-faq-pictures/solpugid2%20copy.jpg
If you wish to be freaked out by spiders, these babies are the ones, even though they’re not true spiders — more closely related to scorpions, I think.
Spider dude
Comment on March 22, 2009 @ 7:42 pm
That’s ridiculous. You’re afraid of a ******* spider!? Some of those aren’t even spiders; they’re tarantulas! Wuss. I have 150 Common house spiders, 20 huntsman, 20 Goliaths, 40 cobalt blues, 10 funnel webs, and 5 black widows. And yet you post the harmless lil’ cuties as the scary ones. What’s next; the frightening corn snake? The terrifying mouse? Giving inverts a bad rep you are, bud. I don’t appreciate it.
seth
Comment on April 7, 2009 @ 9:45 am
cool a spider i was looking for something else dumb asses
mr. mclovin
Comment on April 7, 2009 @ 9:48 am
you guys are fagots
FREAKY DUDE
Comment on May 22, 2009 @ 2:24 am
Your comments on spiders are biased and not factual
doradrang
Comment on December 19, 2009 @ 9:44 am
hello
It makes me happy to have landed here
hot milfs[/url
po' boy
Comment on January 11, 2010 @ 11:07 pm
Blue spider is very sexy looking thing. Do not kill these creatures. They think you are ugly, too. Not a reason to die. Just leave them alone or learn to cuddle with them. Those cute little fuzzy bodies just want to rub up against your cheek and get warm. And please do not eat spiders just because they taste good. Be a vegetarian and do not eat spiders dead or alive. A spider could save your life by eating harmful creatures like rabbits and deer. Spiders are very smart. I have a pet banana spider (golden silk orb) named Bob. He lives in the bathroom and comes over to chat with me when I’m taking a poop. He is a horrible looking thing, actually, but that’s no reason to squish him. He likes to be scratched on the back and rubbed on the belly. He accidendally killed my pit bull playing too rough and bit the dog who swelled up like a balloon and croaked. Now its just me and Bob the banana spider. Sooooooooo…
Aeraea
Comment on February 7, 2010 @ 4:34 pm
Uh… Tarantulas are too spiders. Look it up on wikipedia, first line on there says: “Tarantulas comprise a group of hairy and often very large spiders belonging mainly to the family Theraphosidae, of which approximately 900 species have been identified.”